Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Rating: 1.5/4

It’s been two years since the epic battle between Optimus Prime and Megatron.  The Autobots are now part of the U.S. government  secret program in whichy they find and the dispose the remaining Decepticons.  After an attack on Shanghai goes awry, enter the Government Stooge that tells the U.S. Military that if it weren’t for the Autobots on Earth, the Decepticons would have never attacked.  This leads Optimus Prime to contact Sam Witwicky (Shia LeBeouf) in an attempt to have him be an “ambassador” for the Autobots, since Witwicky destroyed the All-Spark along with Megatron from the previous movie.

                But Sam initially wants nothing to do with the Autobots vs. Decepticons since he’s moving away to college and wants to live a “normal” life with his girlfriend Mikaela (Megan Fox).  Doesn’t Sam realize that after what happened in the first movie, NOTHING comes back to “normal?” But then again, even if it weren’t for the Transformers, nothing in Sam’s family or his college life spell “normal.” 

                But back to the plot: the Decepticons are planning to revive Megatron and the Decepticon Master, the Fallen.  The spoken details of the plot are so incomprehensive that you would have to follow along on what they’re doing, but that’s not the biggest offense of the movie.

                The biggest offense is on how raunchy and suggestive the “comedy” is in this movie.  There are a lot of Transformer characters that spew out one-liners that will definitely get some if not a lot of laughs, but one still has to wonder if any of that is in character of what the Transformers were from the previous series.  Others include highly suggestive innuendos such as two big… balls… floating from the… bottom of Devastator, as well as a rogue Decepticon rubbing on Mikaela’s leg, and Mikaela landing on the mid-section of Sam’s annoying college roommate.  The rest was just at times annoying like Sam screaming like a girl.

                Disappointing was also the screen time and lines Lennox and Epps, the two main U.S. soldiers from the previous movie, were given.  Mostly they were just there to give support for the Transformers. 

                Devastor looked ugly, looked nothing like the yellow and purple machine from the original series.  Starscream was a complete coward.  In the original series, Starscream was a bit of a coward, but he was also ambitious.  In this movie, he said “even cowards win by running away.”  Chris Latta must be spinning on his grave. 

                This movie definitely deserved the PG-13 rating, but this is not a movie for kids because of the high innuendos and uncharacteristic street language from the robots (“bitch”, “ass”, and even “mother”, but not the other word).  There are some PG-13 rated movies that are more suitable for children like the previous 2 Harry Potter films, Superman Returns, and Star Wars Episode III.  Given that this movie is based on children’s toys, parents may be outraged on why this movie got green-lighted with too much sitcom dialogue.

                Transformers will be around for the third time.  Hopefully Steven Spielberg and Michael Bay will spend more time on how to make a more comprehensive and less over-the-top movie, because a reboot like the first one does not deserve to have the honeymoon over.